Recently, I was reflecting on authenticity—first, being true to ourselves by staying connected to who we are and how we are. Then, bringing that authenticity into our interactions, which inevitably brings up issues of transparency, honesty, trust, and safety.

Emotional Intelligence teaches us self-awareness and self-management, helping us choose words and emotions that align with our intentions so that we can balance inner authenticity with our authentic goals and desires.

That brings me to a simple, yet surprisingly tricky, question: How do you authentically answer “How are you?”

If you’re like me, your first instinct is to scan your emotional state. When feeling happy, energized, or positive, it’s easy to respond with an enthusiastic descriptor. But when I’m tired, frustrated, or struggling, the answer depends on who’s asking and the situation. Stumped, I often default to: “Fine.”

But what does fine even mean? It turns out, a lot. As an adjective, it can mean all right, exceptional quality, precise, elegant. As a noun, it refers to a fee or punishment. And in slang, it means good-looking, sexy, hot—which is definitely not how I use it but could certainly make for a more interesting exchange!

So how do we authentically answer this ubiquitous question? Perhaps we consider the full picture. Maybe you’re tired from a lack of sleep yet feeling supported by loved ones. Maybe you’re navigating a challenge but grateful for solutions emerging.

With that kind of approach, a powerful starting point might be gratitude. It’s a healthy resource that shifts our awareness toward the good—big or small. We can be grateful for our morning coffee, a quiet moment, a smooth commute, or simply being present. Gratitude can also acknowledge our struggles: “I’m grateful for all the support I’ve received” (for someone returning to work after illness or loss). Or our successes: “I’m grateful to be celebrating this milestone with you all.”

And gratitude is contagious. It can uplift those around us and enrich our connections. When we express appreciation for things in our lives or for others, it can create a ripple effect, inspiring others to get in touch with what they are grateful for.

So with that, I’m grateful for you all, for this chance to share reflections on a Sunday, for my morning tea, and for the comforting presence of my sleeping poodle beside me as I write.

This week, I invite you to try swapping out fine for grateful—and see how it deepens your sense of authenticity!